JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE UNVEILS FASHION LINE FOR MANLY WOMEN



I'll get right to the point, gentle reader. I've been cultivating a rather sick masturbatory obsession with Justin Timberlake for the better part of a decade.

I've gladly eaten up every cheesy thing he's churned out since he rocked the dancing, gay poodle look in 'NSYNC.

When I heard he was unveiling a fashion line—William Rast—I was skeptical.

J. Timb's made some fashion blunders but seems to have gotten it together as of late.

However, knowing his affinity for buff women, I was wondering what kind of lady styles he'd sign off on.

After a quick little looksie at his Spring 2009 collection I quickly found out.

MANWOMEN!

Aside from a few tacky frocks, the women walking in the William Rast show looked like the hillbilly, hipster version of the lesbians who hang at the dyke bar below my apartment.

Billowy flannel shirts, ill-fitting denim cut-offs, slicked back hair—Jesus, what did he do? Compile a Samantha Ronson look book as inspiration?

Don't get me wrong. I am in no way against an androgynous look. Rag and Bone did a smart and stylish collection of neutral pant suits, girl-ties, and boxy button-ups, that managed to maintain snug, feminine fits, cleverly paired with sky high heels.

Now, I know J. Timb didn't have an urban setting in mind for his redneck collection. Judging from his faux-artsy marketing campaign, he wants a roughed up, Southern, just robbed a mom and pop convenience store, small town crook look.

Whatever.
I won't be buying any of his crap, but he looks damn hot all bloody, sitting in an old jalopy.